Mike Parry

My name is Mike Parry and I am a registered nurse associate in the NHS, which I never thought was my calling at first.

I describe myself as getting pleasure out of helping others and my career lends itself to my aspirations. Originally from Bidford on Avon which is a small village in Warwickshire I then moved to West Oxfordshire when I met my wife.

At school I would describe myself as an ‘child who did not always fit in’ often on my own or only having only one friend at a time and this was in a time when Autism was not widely recognised as it is today especially in my school.

I have a special interest in SciFi, science, technology and everything this entails. I began my career working in technical illustration and graphic design as I have always had an eye for detail. I worked there for 18 years, and later when speaking about changing careers with my wife, who worked in the care field, began support work with people with autism and learning difficulties and this was before my own diagnosis. It was there that I felt that I excelled and related very well to the people who I supported. I would give insight into what the people were trying to communicate and this was noticed by others around me.

Mine, was a late diagnosis on the autism spectrum which was diagnosed at the age of 44. My wife Julia who is a neuro-typical and also who worked for the National Autistic Society and Mencap later in life was the person who first suspected Autism, and later was with me when I was observed before and through the diagnosis. We have been married 15 years and have always got on well and worked out any issues that come along, however the journey has not always been plain sailing, and we needed to work out communication which was difficult for both. With her training and understanding it was definitely easier for us to navigate, but I know that some marriages suffer because of miscommunication and behaviours.

I have had challenges in my life in regards to living in a mostly NT world, where my personality and jovial nature ,which is a me, but working in a professional setting makes me mask, can be misinterpreted for me being unhappy or moody. I decided to get a diagnosis because Julia had advised that I would be protected under the Equalities Act, and secondly for my own benefit of knowing and understanding who I am as an individual.

I often tell others that for me to speak to and be understood by neuro typical people is like a two computers talking to each other where one is a Apple Mac and the other is a Windows based PC. They both speak basically the same language and work almost the same running systems, however there are differences which unless you understood electronics you would not be able to pick up or understand.

I love speaking and I’m very comfortable in a room full of people and this makes others sometimes question my autism. I rarely need to take a break to recharge and get pleasure out of sharing my knowledge and life’s journey to help others to learn about the wide spectrum and how people can differ, as we are not all the same.

I do not always appear to be on the spectrum I am comfortable in putting myself out for others. I have had 44 years of masking, now I am 49 I have become very good at it, however in my home I can need to recharge and sleep to give myself a little more energy, and often brain power for the next thing to face.

I am passionate about being an ambassador for myself and others like me to be better understood in life, the workplace and in general.

My mottos are ‘Once you have met one Autistic, you have only met one Autistic because we differ as much as neuro-typicals’, Also another is specifically based on me personally: ‘ I am too Autistic to be NT and too NT to be Autistic and I am often in the Grey area which is contrary to most Autistic values.